Grandpa Guilt

I’m going to be honest, I feel guilty because I don’t really have a relationship with my grandpas. I know I am not doing enough to be present in their lives…

Sometimes I feel like we don’t really talk or see each other because we don’t live in the same Country. I was born and have lived my whole life (so far) in Vancouver and they live in Honduras. I don’t know, I mean I have a healthy relationship with my grandma who lives in Illinois. She visited us often here in Vancouver during our childhood and we would visit her when she lived in New Orleans and Texas during our adolescence. She came to my wedding in Guadalajara and we talk on the phone de ves en cuando and Facebook each other…

But I feel like that’s a bullshit excuse really because I can pick up a phone and call them, I just don’t know what we’d talk about and I don’t want it to be awkward, you know? But I guess small talk can work in this situation since we would really just be getting to know one another? Uhm, I don’t know..I feel like I need to call them and tell them that I think about them everyday, that I am sorry for rarely communicating or visiting them. But that I want to start… Is a short call better than no call?

No, no…my grandpa’s don’t have Facebook. I’m pretty sure they don’t even have internet. 

Ef, I don’t even know when their birth dates are…ugh, how embarrassing  I feel like such a horrible person. But, I’m going to change this. Later today I’m going to ask my parents for my abuelos birth dates. I will jot them down in my agenda and make sure I send birthday cards (for the first time). What about writing them each a letter and sending them a photo of us the last time we saw each other (one in 2008, the other in 2010). I’m nervous about calling them, to tell you the truth, but I want to do it.

I want to show and tell them how much I love, appreciate and admire them. I want to hear their stories of love, loss, the civil war and so much more…before it’s too late. 

I want more memories with them.

What else can I do to build an authentic relationship with my abuelos?

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  • Reply Aydita

    Yo adoro a mis abuelos! besos

    June 13, 2013 at 5:29 pm
  • Reply Adriana Iris B

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    June 14, 2013 at 2:01 am
    • Reply Adriana Iris B

      Let’s start again. I never had a grandpa. Wish I had. Ask about your ancestors is always a great way to start.

      June 14, 2013 at 2:02 am
  • Reply July B.

    Love my Grandma! I can´t imagine life without her, its another kind of love than with parents.

    Maybe you should come to Honduras to visit them 😉

    June 14, 2013 at 2:18 am
  • Reply Paula Bendfeldt-Diaz

    Have you thought about writing letters? It might be fun to send them handwritten cards and pictures by snail mail. Getting and sending letters is really cool and that way you get to know them little by little without feeling awkward.

    June 14, 2013 at 2:33 am
  • Reply tm

    I understand better than you think. I only have one grandmother left, although we do communicate every once in a while it doesn’t seem like enough. I haven’t seen her in years due to work or school conflicts. My summer plans of seeing her are quickly sinking. But a phone call isn’t too hard to manage. Thanks for the reminder Nina.

    June 14, 2013 at 4:25 am
  • Reply andrea bhaday

    I’m from Honduras you should come and visit your grandpa it’s very cheap to buy a ticket and be here with him

    June 15, 2013 at 1:35 am
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